by Mark Berch
The words are staring at you on paper or on the screen. But what do they really mean? Here’s a handy guide.
I’ve always wanted to try this opening: I’ve never found anyone gullible enough to go along with this opening.
The plan involves some really major risks: I might lose a Supply Center.
This plan involves some fairly minor risks: You might lose a supply center.
Which ever plan you choose, let me know: I can stab you either way.
France told me over the Phone: France told me nothing of the sort.
Your letter didn’t get here in time: I didn’t want to do what you asked.
He’s an awfully strong player: Hey, attack him, not me.
A 17-17 draw is a very satisfying conclusion: I can’t figure out any way to get my hands on an 18th center.
I get only short term benefits: I get to build immediately.
You get the long term benefits: You’ll build on the 12th of Never.
I’m sure your luck against Italy will change next season: I’m not going to send him your moves this time.
Let’s make Tyo a demilitarized zone: I don’t have the strength to attack Tyo yet. I had completely forgotten that Belgium was yours: You forgot to defend Belgium.
We can sort out the SCs later: My bargaining position will be much stronger later.
It was so obvious that I neglected to mention that: I knew you wouldn’t like it.
The general gist of your letter was that…: I only skimmed your letter before pitching it.
My fleet-to-army ratio was getting unnaturally low: I need fleets to stab you.
My misorder was accidental: It was deliberate.
My misorder was deliberate: It was an accident.
I think we trust each other enough to skip the arranged standoff: I’m finally ready to attack you.
The tactic you mentioned hadn’t occurred to me: I was hoping you wouldn’t think of that plan.
Since you picked the tactics last season, it’s my turn: It didn’t matter what we did last season.
I’m sure you analyzed this very carefully, but…: I can’t make heads or tails of what you wrote, so I’m going to do what I want.
I’ve heard that rumor too: I made up that story two weeks ago.
I don’t play for ratings, I play for fun: I’ll do whatever it takes to win.
Reprinted from Diplomacy World 80